My Kinda Sad Kinda Bucket List

Ever Foot Needs a Good Peeling

In my life I have covered a lot of ground. Certainly, I am not a world traveler who has amazing adventures all the time, but I haven't lived a crappy life.  I have gone to and finished graduate school; I have written a book of short fiction; I have up and moved half way across the country to live amongst the hippies of San Francisco; I have jumped off a roof into a pool; I hiked up mountains in Colorado; I have watched a drug deal in the Bahamas; I have burned my feet off on a sandy Texas beach; I have gone on a date with a man I met on craigslist and lived to tell about it (and our upcoming nuptials).

I have not lived the fanciest of lives, but I have lived. But, it dawned on me tonight that I haven't done a lot of things in life.  They aren't hard things or rare things or things that would take a person a lifetime to achieve.  They are just simple things.  And, I think I can remedy some of them quiet easily.  Here's the list that I have come up with so far.

So Dewy, So Mountainy

1.  I have never had Mountain Dew.  Never.  Not once.  I claim to hate it because I do.  However, how the hell do I actually know that when I have never had it.  Easily fixed.  I can just go buy one.  I might. I might not.  I don't think my life will fall to pieces if I never taste the dew of some green-yellow mountain.  But it might.

2.  I have never gone camping.  Never.  Not once.  I have never slept outside under the stars.  I have never grilled over an open campfire unless you count one in someone's back yard that I probably got someone else to grill over for me.  At this point in my life, I would really like to camp.  I don't really go for that sort of thing because it's outside.  And, that's where the nature and the grass is.  And the no toilets.  But, for the past couple of years, I have really wanted to do it.  I think it would be good for me.  If you want to encourage this, just go to our wedding registry.  I registered for a bunch of camping stuff.  I don't think we will get it, but if we do I will go. I would feel guilty if I didn't.

3.  I have never seen Top Gun.  I probably won't be on getting this one done.  I have a real dislike for Tom Cruise.  I could have seen Top Gun at anytime at this point, but I never have.  Heck, I had access to a million movies for years at my sister's video store.  And, I have had Netflix since 2006.  It's Tom Cruise.  I just can't watch it because of him.  I tend to avoid him at all costs.  I don't want Xenu to snatch up my brain.  So, though I have done this one, I probably won't.

4.  I have never owned a new car.  Now, this one is going to be a little tougher to have happen.  In fact, it is not going to happen any time soon.  I don't mind.  One day maybe.  But, that's a big responsibility and a big, ole car payment.  Not for me right now especially since the truck is still kicking.  Maybe one day I will be a fancy lady in a new car.  Maybe.

5.  I have never eaten lobster.  Again, I could do this this week, I am sure.  But, I still think it odd that I have never eaten it.  It's out there.  It's available.  I've just never gotten around to it.  Maybe I can have a lobster/Mountain Dew feast this weekend!  I mean, there is a seafood lover in me.  So, maybe I'll make it a party!

6.  I have never had a professional pedicure.  Heck, I have only had a manicure once, and that was back when I went to the prom.  But, pedicures have not blessed these toes.  Sure, I cut and paint my toenails all the time.  They are cute!  I keep them that way.  But, there is nothing more I would love than having someone do it for me.  For some reason, though, I can't seem to bring myself to do it.  I feel bad for the person having to touch my feet.  Ugh.  It makes me so uncomfortable.  One day I want a pedicure.  Once I get over the guilt, I will try it out.

Laura, We're All Happy Here!

7.  I have never been to a Disney place.  Dammit!  I will go to a Disney place.  I want to go to Disneyland so bad.  You people have no idea.  I (as a 36 year old woman) want to throw a hissy fit every time I hear of some kid getting to go to Disneyland.  They won't appreciate it like I will!  They won't!  Take me.  I'm more fun than some dumb 7 year old.  I don't care if it is your kid.  I'm better.  Take me!  (There's that tantrum I spoke of.)  Unfortunately, Disneyland is more expensive than a new car.  So, here's to one day striking it rich or moving to Orlando and getting a job as Goofy or something.  Man, I want to go to Disneyland.

Well, there's a start of things I have never done.  I might continue this in later blogs if I can think of more.  I mean, there are many more.  So so so so many more things I have never done.  Of course, I might not add to it because I have a short attention span.  Feel free to let me know things you haven't done. I  would like to know who else hasn't done such droll and normal things.  Maybe it isn't just me.  It probably is, but I hope not.