My Kinda Sad Kinda Bucket List

Ever Foot Needs a Good Peeling

In my life I have covered a lot of ground. Certainly, I am not a world traveler who has amazing adventures all the time, but I haven't lived a crappy life.  I have gone to and finished graduate school; I have written a book of short fiction; I have up and moved half way across the country to live amongst the hippies of San Francisco; I have jumped off a roof into a pool; I hiked up mountains in Colorado; I have watched a drug deal in the Bahamas; I have burned my feet off on a sandy Texas beach; I have gone on a date with a man I met on craigslist and lived to tell about it (and our upcoming nuptials).

I have not lived the fanciest of lives, but I have lived. But, it dawned on me tonight that I haven't done a lot of things in life.  They aren't hard things or rare things or things that would take a person a lifetime to achieve.  They are just simple things.  And, I think I can remedy some of them quiet easily.  Here's the list that I have come up with so far.

So Dewy, So Mountainy

1.  I have never had Mountain Dew.  Never.  Not once.  I claim to hate it because I do.  However, how the hell do I actually know that when I have never had it.  Easily fixed.  I can just go buy one.  I might. I might not.  I don't think my life will fall to pieces if I never taste the dew of some green-yellow mountain.  But it might.

2.  I have never gone camping.  Never.  Not once.  I have never slept outside under the stars.  I have never grilled over an open campfire unless you count one in someone's back yard that I probably got someone else to grill over for me.  At this point in my life, I would really like to camp.  I don't really go for that sort of thing because it's outside.  And, that's where the nature and the grass is.  And the no toilets.  But, for the past couple of years, I have really wanted to do it.  I think it would be good for me.  If you want to encourage this, just go to our wedding registry.  I registered for a bunch of camping stuff.  I don't think we will get it, but if we do I will go. I would feel guilty if I didn't.

3.  I have never seen Top Gun.  I probably won't be on getting this one done.  I have a real dislike for Tom Cruise.  I could have seen Top Gun at anytime at this point, but I never have.  Heck, I had access to a million movies for years at my sister's video store.  And, I have had Netflix since 2006.  It's Tom Cruise.  I just can't watch it because of him.  I tend to avoid him at all costs.  I don't want Xenu to snatch up my brain.  So, though I have done this one, I probably won't.

4.  I have never owned a new car.  Now, this one is going to be a little tougher to have happen.  In fact, it is not going to happen any time soon.  I don't mind.  One day maybe.  But, that's a big responsibility and a big, ole car payment.  Not for me right now especially since the truck is still kicking.  Maybe one day I will be a fancy lady in a new car.  Maybe.

5.  I have never eaten lobster.  Again, I could do this this week, I am sure.  But, I still think it odd that I have never eaten it.  It's out there.  It's available.  I've just never gotten around to it.  Maybe I can have a lobster/Mountain Dew feast this weekend!  I mean, there is a seafood lover in me.  So, maybe I'll make it a party!

6.  I have never had a professional pedicure.  Heck, I have only had a manicure once, and that was back when I went to the prom.  But, pedicures have not blessed these toes.  Sure, I cut and paint my toenails all the time.  They are cute!  I keep them that way.  But, there is nothing more I would love than having someone do it for me.  For some reason, though, I can't seem to bring myself to do it.  I feel bad for the person having to touch my feet.  Ugh.  It makes me so uncomfortable.  One day I want a pedicure.  Once I get over the guilt, I will try it out.

Laura, We're All Happy Here!

7.  I have never been to a Disney place.  Dammit!  I will go to a Disney place.  I want to go to Disneyland so bad.  You people have no idea.  I (as a 36 year old woman) want to throw a hissy fit every time I hear of some kid getting to go to Disneyland.  They won't appreciate it like I will!  They won't!  Take me.  I'm more fun than some dumb 7 year old.  I don't care if it is your kid.  I'm better.  Take me!  (There's that tantrum I spoke of.)  Unfortunately, Disneyland is more expensive than a new car.  So, here's to one day striking it rich or moving to Orlando and getting a job as Goofy or something.  Man, I want to go to Disneyland.

Well, there's a start of things I have never done.  I might continue this in later blogs if I can think of more.  I mean, there are many more.  So so so so many more things I have never done.  Of course, I might not add to it because I have a short attention span.  Feel free to let me know things you haven't done. I  would like to know who else hasn't done such droll and normal things.  Maybe it isn't just me.  It probably is, but I hope not.

Grocery Mecca, I have found Thee....

Okay, I am about to look like an adult here which I don't like at all. But, here goes.

Upon moving to a whole new part of town, I have moved to a whole new grocery store. I have clung to my HEB Hancock Center for some 10 or so years now. It is very central to every place I have lived in this town. Now, it is a bit of a drive, and there is an HEB 47 seconds away from our new place. And I mean 47 seconds. I have counted it twice. It f'ing rules that it is that close.

So, day before yesterday, the Jodster and I decide it is time to go in and pick up a few things. You can only eat out so many times before you are just broke. So, we go in. And what do I find? I find the greatest grocery store I have ever seen!

It is huge, beautiful, clean, full of all kinds of neat stuff that my old store didn't have. There is an entire kosher deli! Now, I'm not Jewish, but that is freaking cool! It's so super fancy! We are totally out of place, but I don't mind. I bet nary a Lone Star Card has passed through the place (don't get me wrong, I don't mind Lone Star Card recipients because I am about $32.34 away from being one myself. I am just saying, they have never been here.) For real, this place is awesome! See...



Do you see the shine on that floor? And look at the length of that aisle! And this is only one of three! three!!! cooler aisles! The vegetarian section is so big it is on two aisles! It's like a haven for Amy's products! Oh, there is a Jesus, and he shops at the Jewish HEB! But, seriously, do you see that shine on the floor? They clean the place! It's incredible.

Then as we turn a corner, what do I see? This...



A Dr. Scholl's foot pressure measurer thingy! Jody and I had just talked about wanting to stand on one (well, I talked about it. He listened nicely about me wanting to look up where to find one and driving to it because even if it had been in San Antonio, I would have made him go find it!)! We turn the corner, and there it is! Hallelujah! Turns out I am a 430, and Jody is a 330 (we didn't buy them because they are $50, and our feet are fine). Bunch of flat footed archless losers, aren't we? Wait, you don't know because your store doesn't have one! I love this store. I do.

Now, we didn't do hardcore shopping because we were hungry. Oh, and let me say just one last thing about it...9 types of tomatoes! Nine! I make salsa all the time, so having that many types of tomatoes to add to it is awesome! But, we are going tomorrow to do actual shopping shopping. Sadly, we are on a budget because moving always costs about a thousand more dollars than you think it will. And this place is magnificent! So, it is going to suck to budget shop. But, alas, I am an expert at it at this point.

So, there is my happiness at living 47 seconds from the most super awesome whooper doopity doo HEB! And the parking is good. Oh, I am a happy girl.

The downfall of moving? We can't find our dishes which is forcing us to do stuff like this...



Yes, I had to eat my pizza off of a cutting board! Now, it's Mangia pizza, so you have to use a fork and a plate. It's freaking good. But, how sad are we?

Unpacking and grocery shopping, here we come. This weekend shall be fab!